Catch the Wind
by StickyRice
Summary: A songfic based on one of my favorite traditional folksongs. Asbel longs for the love of a woman whose heart he knows he will never win.


Catch the wind is an old folk song that I've loved for many years. A little while ago I realized how apropos it was to Nausicaä, so I decided to put it into a short little love story about my two favorite characters. Enjoy!

Catch The Wind

By: StickyRice

A fierce wind blew through the night sky, tearing at the swaying branches of nearby trees and bringing with it a chilly, unfriendly bite. It whistled between the thick trunks, teasing the leaves of trees and bushes. The thick and foreboding cloud cover blocked out any light from the thin, twinkling stars that would have otherwise illuminated the shrouded valley.

A young man shivered and pulled his jacket up around him, holding out his tiny lantern in a feeble attempt to light up the inky black forest. The wind rattled the branches overhead and the overcast sky threatened to open up in a deluge of rain at any minute. He was still far from shelter and already his boots were beginning to grow heavy with mud and moisture. What little warmth his think jacket offered was not enough to keep the wind's icy breath from his skin. Soon the rain would start and pelt the turbulent forest, leaving him not only cold but wet as well. He had to get back before the storm started.

"_In the chilly hours and minutes of uncertainty,"_

The man looked up. A castle had just appeared through the branches, a large black blot against the sky. He squinted and focused his vision on a tiny pinpoint of flickering yellow light high up in one of the towers. A quiet sigh escaped him. He knew very well to whom that light belonged. No one else took such delight in these cold, late nights. Inside that distant room sat a beautiful young woman, most likely writing in her journal, completely unaware of her distant admirer. The man shook his head and continued walking.

"_I long to be in the warm hold of your loving mind,"_

Half an hour later, he stood with his hand poised to knock on her door. He hesitated, then gave a tentative rap. When no response came, he knocked a little louder, his heart wavering each time his knuckles met the heavy wood. He heard a surprised 'oh!' and the scraping of chair legs being pushed across the floor. A few seconds later the door opened.

There she stood in front of him, the most beautiful woman to ever walk the earth. Her red hair glowed in the firelight, setting off the vivid green of her eyes that stared at him unflinchingly. There was joy there, but not the kind he had hoped to find there.

"Hello Asbel! I thought it might be you!"

Asbel opened his mouth to speak, but could not think of anything to say. Before he could manage anything intelligent, he felt her arms around him.

"I missed you. I haven't seen you in so long." Came her voice from somewhere near his ear.

Whatever breath had still been in his lungs was gone now. His skin prickled at having her so close. He circled his arms around her, disbelieving, as if she might pull away if he did so. That did not, however, stop him from enjoying her embrace. To him it was the most wonderful thing imaginable just to be standing there, holding his Nausicaä in his arms.

Eventually she let go and Asbel reluctantly released her. She stood back and smiled up at him brightly.

"So, how was your trip? I hope Mito didn't work you too hard."

"Uh, no."

"Tell me if he did. I'll have a talk with him." She looked past him out into the hallway, a sprightly glint in her eyes, "I should probably go say hello. Mito will get grumpy if I wait too long!"

"_To take your hand along the sand_

_Would be the sweetest thing,"_

Nausicaä looked back at him before stepping into her room again.

"Was there something you wanted to tell me?

"Oh, uh, no." He stuttered, "I just wanted to say hello, and goodnight."

"Oh, well, goodnight…" She hesitated, "Is that all?"

Asbel scratched the back of his head. "Um. Yeah, I think so."

"_Would make me sing,"_

'Tell her.' He urged himself.

He didn't.

"All right then, I'll see you tomorrow." She said as she closed the door, slight dissatisfaction dancing across her features.

The heavy door closed with a click, leaving Asbel alone in the cold bare hallway.

"_Ah, but I may as well try and catch the wind."_

A week had passed since Asbel's return, and he hadn't spoken to Nausicaä since. There were things to be done in the Valley, fields to be sewn, ships to repair. In the downtime he had he kept to his room, not knowing what he would say should he happen to see her. That evening he sat staring out at the bland gray sky. It was raining again, though it was not as fierce as it had been the night of his return. Large raindrops pattered softly on his window, chasing each other down the panes to collect in the corners. The cold air outside seeped through the windowpanes, creating a frosty aura against the glass.

"_When the rain has hung_  
_The leaves with tears,"_

Abel sighed, his mind filled with unpleasant memories of Pejitei. He still couldn't forget is sister's death, and how he hadn't been there for her. It haunted him still. Even though she had died with honor, Nausicaa by her side, he felt as if, had he been there, maybe she wouldn't have had to leave this world so soon.

Footsteps echoed in the hallway. Asbel's' heart stopped as he listened. Every time some one walked by he hoped it would be Nausicaä come to say hello. His heart fell along with the dying sound of the footsteps bypassing his door. It was never her.

"_I want you near to kill my fears."_

That night he saw her at dinner. One of the castle uncles was celebrating his 60th birthday and the entire valley was in celebration, joyous, talkative, and dressed their finest. Asbel could not bring himself to be part of it. He was still new and not well acquainted with anyone save Nausicaä and Mito. He kept quiet, hovering by one of the long tables set with preparations for dinner. He had immediately located Nausicaä across the room, talking and laughing with someone he didn't recgonize.

At one point her gaze drifted and she caught his eye, grinning shyly and looking away quickly. Asbel's heart thumped.

"_To help me to leave all_  
_My blues behind."_

He had had those wonderful eyes in his gaze again, and in a fleeting moment they were no longer upon him.

The man beside her looked to be about their age, and was clearly not from the valley. He wondered why he had not been informed of the other's arrival, as guests in the valley were relatively rare. Asbel couldn't help but notice that Nausicaä looked happy, very happy. He wondered what it would be like to be that man, to have the power to make Nausicaä freely smile like that.

"_For standing in your heart,"_

Asbel had always believed that he had a chance of winning her heart. Seeing her tonight made him realize how wrong he was. Nausicaä was not one to be won, and he knew it.

"_Is where I want to be,_  
_And long to be,"_

The young man offered his arm to Nausicaä and she took it. She gave one last tentative glance in Asbel's direction before leaving. She moved slowly, ever so slowly away from him, weaving through the crowd of unfamiliar faces. Finally she was but a gray shadow in the dark doorway, and then she was gone.

"_Ah, but I may as well try and_  
_Catch the wind."_

Asbel sat on the grassy bank near the edge of a small forest. Nausicaä was sitting by his side, her knees pulled up to her chest. They had run into each other on the way home from the fields and could not make any excuses not to say hello. Now they sat watching the valley people go about finishing their day's work and heading back to their houses. The plump sun had already begun to set and held the valley in a lazy evening stupor. Orange light psilled across the hills and reflected in the flooded rice paddies.

Nausicaä looked over at Asbel and smiled warmly at him.

"_When the sundown pales the sky,_  
_I want to hide a while behind your smile."_

"I should be getting back now." Nausicaä announced as she stood up. Asbel follow suit, slipping a bit on th damp grass. He righted himself and found his face dengerously close to hers.

There he was again, staring into those crisp green polished-jade eyes. He had seen death, escaped death, delivered death. He had fought off hoards of raging forest insects, gunned down ships, and ventured into he very belly of the crypt of Shuwa, and yet still he was powerless under the innocent gaze of this one woman.

"_And everywhere I'd look_  
_Your eyes I'd find."_

A gentle breeze blew across their faces, breaking their trance. Nausicaä cleared her throat and Asbel looked quickly away.

"Anyway, I'll see you later then."

As she turned her hair fluttered against him in the wind. He reached out his hand and let it gently slide across his fingers.

"_For me to love you now,_  
_Would be the sweetest thing,_  
_Would make me sing,"_

Before he knew it she was gone; nothing but a small figure running quickly towards the castle. He had stood by and watched her go again. He was again reminded by her receding figure of how he would never win her heart. There was no use in trying.

"_Ah, but I may as well try and_  
_Catch the wind."_

The ocean current blew steady wind that beat against the cliff face. Chilly gusts slapped Asbel's' face as he looked out to sea. Fearsome waves threw themselves foaming and crashing against the cliff, occasionally showering him with curtains of salty mist. The salt in the air was thick in his lungs, slick on his face, and heavy on his sagging shoulders.

"_In the chilly hours of uncertainty,_  
_I long to be"_

He took in a deep breath and stretched out his arms, trying to calm his racing mind, trying to think about anything but her.

"_In the warm hold_  
_Of your loving mind."_

He breathed out sharply in exasperation and let his hands slump to his sides again. He looked down at the jagged rocks, regarding them curiously, as if they were different now than before.

Nothing made sense to him anymore.

Nothing was worth making sense of anyway.

"_To take your hand along the sand,"_

He kept staring, the rest of the world blanking out around him. The turbulent sea swirled through his vision and gradually seemed to be coming closer.

Then, to his horror, Asbel realized that it was.

He was falling, falling down toward the sea. His toes were balancing on the edge of the cliff. He couldn't steady himself. He was going to fall.

"_Would be the sweetest thing,_  
_Would make me sing,"_

A heavy gust pushed against his chest and lifted him upwards, sending him flying back onto firm ground. He blinked dazedly for a minute, trying to figure out what had just happened.

"_Ah, but I may as well try and_  
_Catch the wind._

_Ah, but I may as well try and_  
_Catch the wind."_

He quickly got to his feet and ran to the highest point of the cliff. Instinctively, he reached his hand up into the air, letting the wind snag on his palm and slide down along his fingers. For the first time in ages, Asbel smiled genuinely. There he stood, frazzled, helpless, and happy, holding the breeze in his hand.

"_Ah, but I may as well try and _

_catch the wind."_


End file.
